On my laptop I have a folder of all my pictures prior to this computer. Last week I opened it to look for pictures for a project and instead of being greeted by a plethora of pictures I am greeted by this message:
Now don't get me wrong. I was sad that these pictures were gone. Family vacations, nieces growing up, choir trip, graduation, etc. My family computer I had them all stored on crashed a few months earlier and stuff was only partially recovered...so I was pretty sure everything was gone. I ended up being okay with it all. I figured I had a decent amount of pictures on Facebook, many pictures were dorky self-portraits of a funny looking girl, and everyone in the pictures was still in existence so I knew I would be able to get more even though they wouldn't be snapshots capturing the old memories.
Thursday I am looking on Pinterest and show my roommates this picture:
The owl bedding is adorable...but what I was really focused on was the cute dachshund pillow on the bed.
You see....from about age 4 to age 18 my family had the cutest little wiener dog. See?
Yeah. Adorable, I know. He wasn't very good at listening though. I remember telling him explicitly before my choir trip he wasn't allowed to die while I was gone. Yeah. He failed at listening. The night I got home and found out I bawled pretty much all night. He was the friend who was always there no matter what was going on in life.
Anyway, back to the owl bedding. I started googling dachshund things. I'm sitting in our cute little grandpa recliner with my cute little green laptop resting in my cute little lap. And suddenly, something in my brain clicks. I scream NO!!! and have curious glances directed my way from inquisitive roommates. I race to open the folder..and sure enough, my worst fear is confirmed. The folder still looks like this:
EMPTY. GONE.
I start laughing. I start crying. I am just a mess. Those are the two dominant ways of dealing with my emotions and both decide to manifest themselves at the exact same moment.
"Kelly, are you okay?"
"I...I don't think so." I sit, staring at my computer in disbelief, tears welling up in my eyes.
I sat for at least ten minutes staring at the screen. Then, I notice button in the top right corner. It says something about arranging the pictures by different things. I click it and change the settings...and miraculously all the pictures fill the screen. I was beyond excited. I felt beyond stupid. I knew how ridiculous I looked and sounded. He was just a dog. But really, he wasn't. He was much, much more.
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